Thursday, July 19

I Was Alright for Awhile

Ate nothing. Walked 10 and a half miles. Gained a pound.

That’s not possible.

And yet.

Whinged to everyone who’d listen.

Christina: “You’re in starvation mode. You have to eat.”
Me: “OK, but still. Where did the pound come from?”
Christina: “Eat!”

Hubby: “It’s the humidity. It’s causing the scale to misread your weight.”

Kelley: “Maybe you’re sleepwalking and sneaking food out of the refrigerator in your sleep.” (Actually, that may be the winning explanation; it’s the only one that makes scientific sense. Except that I still can’t get down the stairs without nearly breaking my neck when I’m not asleep. Seems unlikely I’d negotiate the stairs safely while unconscious.)

Robin: “Your body can’t just ‘tell’ itself that it’s starving. It’s not like you carry a spare brain in your butt that secretly plots with your cells. And even if it could talk to itself, it can’t make fat out of air... but nothing else makes sense, so I guess it's just magic.

Johnny Walker: “Maybe the scale’s miscalibrated. Stop weighing yourself.”

Me: “Sob.”

- - - -
Roy Orbison, are you Crying too?